“The Charlize Theron Africa Outreach Project (CTAOP) is committed to reducing the prevalence of HIV/AIDS and sexual violence among African youth by supporting and collaborating with organizations that provide preventive education. Experience the positive impact we are making by learning more about Our Work.

CTAOP’s efforts began from a partnership formed in 2007 between Academy Award-winning actress and native South African, Charlize Theron, and the Entertainment Industry Foundation (EIF). EIF is a leading charitable organization of the entertainment industry distributing hundreds of millions of dollars to charitable initiatives addressing critical health, education and social issues. EIF manages charitable services funds such as ours for individuals and companies within the entertainment community to help them achieve a meaningful impact in the world.”

Check out a few pictures:

Photocredit: Michael Buckner/Getty Images North America

(SAN FRANCISCO, CA) Ever displaying a contagiously effervescent smile, superbly entertaining film and screen actress and native San Franciscan Terri J. Vaughn is founder of TAKE WINGS FOUNDATION, a non-profit organization that addresses social and life skills needs of at-risk teens. On Saturday, August 13, 2011, TAKE WINGS hosted its eighth annual black-tie affair to benefit the Foundation. Actresses Nicole Ari Parker and Malinda Williams were very able and entertaining co-hosts for the highly-attended affair. (Due to an unexpected obligation, Boris Kodjoe was unable to join his wife Nicole for celebrity host duties. Talented NAACP Image Award nominee Williams graciously stepped in to join Parker to co-host the evening event.) Grammy award-nominated R&B vocalist Kelly Price performed three scheduled soulful songs. At Parker’s urging, Price also performed an unplanned acappella gospel selection of encouragement to the youth.

ANGEL AWARD RECIPIENTS:

Take Wings Foundation presented its 2011 Angel Awards to two Bay Area community leaders in recognition of their respective professional contributions and community involvement.

Vaughn’s sister and Take Wings Foundation Executive Director Tracy L. Ward presented one of the two well-deserved awards to Edward Fitzpatrick, President of Fitzpatrick Dealership Group (Valley BMW and Valley Lexus in Modesto, and Coliseum Lexus of Oakland). Fitzpatrick is a philanthropic contributor to the arts, education and community enhancement. In recognition of the monetary commitment that he and his wife made to California State University, Stanislaus, the campus arena at the university was renamed Ed and Bertha Fitzpatrick Arena early this year. During his award acceptance speech, Fitzpatrick expressed how proud he is of Vaughn and the impact her Foundation is making on the community. He also encouraged the Take Wings youth to strive for higher learning, to follow their dreams, to be successful in their chosen fields, and be productive members of the community.

Helen K. Vaughn, Take Wings board member and mother of Terri J. Vaughn, was delighted to make the award presentation to Dr. Warren J. Strudwick Jr., while underscoring his many professional accomplishments and charitable works with Bay Area young people. Dr. Strudwick is a board certified orthopedic surgeon and sports medicine physician. Among his many appointments, he is president of Sinkler Miller Medical Association and team physician for the Oakland Raiders and the U.S. Olympic Track & Field team. Dr. Strudwick serves on the Board of Trustees for Oakland’s St. Vincent’s Day School, and also works with young people on the Physicians Medical Forum “Doctors On Board Program,” a mentor program for youth interested in becoming physicians.

BENEFIT CONTRIBUTORS:
Among the House of Hennessy’s elaborate displays of support was its sponsored auction item–a future private dinner experience for ten, which will include a multi-course cuisine paired with a tasting of the Prestige range of Hennessy, conducted by Global Ambassador and eighth generation Hennessy family member, Maurice Hennessy. KBLX 102.9-FM radio personality Kimmie Taylor administered the fast-paced live auction. Adonal Foyle–former center for the Golden State Warriors, founder of the Lamplight Foundation, and a 2008 Take Wings Foundation Angel Award Honoree–was the successful bidder at $3,300. The auction proceeds will benefit Take Wings Foundation.

At the conclusion of his award acceptance, Dr. Strudwick announced that the Oakland Raider’s organization, along with other contributors, have made donations to support a book scholarship fund for Take Wings youth who are graduating high school, and going on to colleges and universities.
Vaughn and her Take Wings Foundation are grateful to the event’s sponsors Golden State Warriors, House of Hennessy, KBLX 102.9-FM, Safeway, Inc., Wells Fargo, Kaiser Permanente, Ms. Ingrid Moore, Bay Area Orthopedic Sports & Spine, Coliseum Lexus of Oakland, Valero Energy Foundation and Ross Stores; individual and group table sponsors; and the many individuals and organizations who made separate donations and promises of ongoing support of the Take Wings Foundation.

ABOUT TAKE WINGS FOUNDATION:
Founded in 1997 by Terri J. Vaughn, Take Wings Foundation is a non-profit organization whose mission is to build the self esteem of San Francisco Bay Area at-risk teens between the ages of 13 and 18 by providing positive experiences and role modeling. The foundation’s core components in achieving its mission involve encouraging and enabling youth to provide community service, participate in life skills development activities and workshops, and earn academic scholarships, while emphasizing education, health and fitness. In 2010 TWF added a male youth module to its previously all-girls program. www.TakeWings.org

Photocredit: Horace Gipson

I told him that I needed him and many like him to make it happen. I could write persuasively but I needed powerful images on par with those seen in the West of Africans in fashion doing their thing. Fashion connects with women, worldwide and that is how I intended to change our image as Africans, one fashion story at a time. Coincidentally, he wanted the same thing. That vision in my head over three years ago, when I made that call, is now a reality. It is what you see before you as Ladybrille. Folks, if you can dream it, you can achieve it. The impossible is possible.

Welcome to Ladybrille Magazine’s March 2011 Spring Fashion Edition! My hope is that as we focus on African fashion this month, where Ladybrille began, every article you read on our website, throughout the month, informs, inspires, excites and pushes you to make your dreams a reality. What better way to really drive home the point than for us at Ladybrille to honor a woman whose legacy illustrates the power of belief? I speak of the one and only IMAN, a fashion icon, activist and humanitarian.

“She is flawless and proof positive of the power of conviction in a world where success can be elusive and out of reach. You have to give it up to Iman. She did it on her own,” is what Michael Palladino, formerly with Henri Bendel and now fashion professor at LIM College in New York, had to say when I placed Iman’s cover on my personal Facebook profile page. Indeed.

If you were wondering who I spoke of in my introduction, his name is Simon Deiner, a prolific photographer based in South Africa. He is our Ladybrille Man of the Month. Simon, since our phone talk, is now one of the most recognizable names in Africa’s fashion industry. He has shared his images with Ladybrille and countless others offline and online. Almost every image from fashion shows and events online has Simon’s name tagged to it. We salute and celebrate him. His feature will be published on Thursday, March 10th, 2011, while Iman’s will be on Monday March 7th, 2011.

There are more amazing features throughout the month like our emerging Artist to Watch Allegra Fletcher, jewelry designer Monalisa Okojie of Nehita Designs and of course loads of African inspired fashions. We are also not quite finished with our coverage of fashion weeks. There are collections from all of the fashion shows since last month we will feature throughout the month. Stay connected with us. “LIKE” our Facebook fan page, follow us on twitter, share with a friend the other side of Africa they never see. Share with them our work on Ladybrille.

Watch Angelique Kidjoe Pay Tribute to Iman at the BET Honors Awarding.

Yours truly,
(editor@ladybrille.com)
Uduak Oduok, Esq.
Editor-in-Chief
www.ladybrillemag.com

Fiore urges us to use the powerful immediacy of heartfelt text messages to become love letters 2.0. “In some ways, electronic love mail is more romantic than love letters of the past because the contact is much more frequent so when you’re crazy-in-love you might be texting every five minutes, you’re constantly checking your phone for a text,” said Fiore to Ladybrille Magazine. “It’s the rush of immediacy that makes this effective.”

What are the statistics on texting?

America, according to Fiore, has become a textaholic nation:

• Over two-thirds of Americans sleep with their cell phones on, tucked up right next to their pillow.

• The latest U.S. Census figures tell us that 44% of American adults are single, or in round numbers, 100 million American singles.

SOME TIPS THIS VALENTINE’S DAY FROM FIORE IF YOU WILL TEXT:

Sent from Women to Men:

It’s much more than “I love you.” It’s I’m thinking about you right now.

1: Your Man’s Cell Phone is the closest thing to “Telepathy” that you can get. Rather than trying to force him to pay attention to you and “put the phone down;” texting him let’s you do a little bit of “relationship judo” and get him to do what you really want him to do without ever coming across as nagging or unreasonable at all.

2: Guys Respond to visual stimuli. Guys are not always as emotionally complex as women and are a lot more blunt in their communication. If you want your guy to give you the romance and attention you crave, you’ve got to speak his language first. That means using visual language in our texts.

3: Romantically, men need to feel like they are able to win you over all over again. The thrill of the flirt, the chase and feeling like he’s “still got it.” The “it” being the ability to capture your full attention. You stopped what you were doing to send him a note that addressed his interest to be your one and only focus of attention. It isn’t about control. It’s about feeling special and singular in your busy life.

TIPS:

Sent from Men to Women:

1: Your woman’s cell phone is a “magic portal” to her deepest, most intimate mind. Women are already used to sharing their most intimate and private thoughts on the phone, through text and (less and less) through phone calls.

2: A woman is passionate at every age. The vast majority of women see their passions increase as they get into their 30’s, 40’s and 50’s.

3: Women respond to verbal, descriptive and emotional stimuli . Women are hard wired to respond to more cerebral material.

Happy Valentine’s! For more information on texting 2.0 Love Letter, visit Fiore’s texttheromanceback.com.

~Uduak Oduok
~Photocredit: Life123

This attitude is very typical of African parents- close-minded, and viewing few fields as acceptable because their own life experiences led them to believe the health/medical field is the guaranteed path to plenty money, thus spending much of their child’s life up until early adulthood forcing their wants upon them. However for some children, they eventually take left field; chasing their own dreams and not their parents, choosing a career other than one in the medical field.

I can remember an unpleasant moment, when my young cousin told his mother that he wants to be an artist. However, his mother seemed embarrassed by his expression despite her knowledge of his interest.    His mom was especially embarrassed because it was said in front of my Nigerian parents and other family members in our home.  She told him, “You can become an artist after getting your degree in medicine.”   I laughed. I told her it was okay that he wants to be an artist because his passion for it will take him far, but with her success as a pharmacist she wasn’t a believer.

Unfortunately, I can certainly relate to his experience as my own are very similar.  Finalizing my choice to major in Africana studies in college did not settle well with my parents.    They were angry that I did not follow through with Anesthesiology.  After all, it’s what they have been pressuring me to do even though I was never interested in it.  I simply was not gifted in the sciences nor was it something that came naturally.  As I matured and began thinking for myself, I became real with what my true passions were and therefore I declared it as my major in school.  Initially the support of my parents was non-existent. They constantly doubted how I would fair pursuing African studies in school, questioning what type of living I would make for myself and tried to change my mind, though it was already made up.  They are not completely supportive of my career choice and at times they even mention I should take courses in biology and anatomy incase I choose the health field all over again, though I assure them there is no possibility of that happening.

Nigerian examples like playwright and Nobel Prize winner Wole Soyinka, NFL player Amobi Okoye, dancer Ade Obayomi, and recording artist Laura Izibor are all successful because of their determination.  They have proven that with focus and drive, Africans can make plenty of money pursuing careers in other fields, like in the arts and entertainment.  Much like them, African children with desires of being actors, musicians, and writers prove their determination as their parent’s witness.  Very often their doubt turns into joy, reaping the financial benefits of their successful children.

~Ashley I. Okonkwo
~Brynmawr.edu

It is the cultural norm in many countries across the world where a man pursuing a woman as his wife must prove to her and her family that he is hardworking, able-bodied, “the head,” and loving. He demonstrates such qualities by having a stable career and taking care of her in all aspects; emotionally, physically and financially. In the couple’s original country, life for the woman is secure, he and she both provide for each other and they work together as partners. However, after migrating to the United States of America, many times, their lives change and the wife is left being the sole provider while the husband (in many situations) stays home comfortably, not concerned with or actively pursuing work. What once used to be a career-driven and hardworking husband has now allowed his new environment to distract him from his role as a man and husband. As a result, the wife is faced with the financial burden and although her career can support the two, it is a struggle doing so all by herself.

Such circumstance would naturally force the wife to make all the financial decisions concerning matters like the mortgage, phone bills, and household expenses. With children involved, additional responsibilities like school fees, and other needs rests on her shoulders. Regardless of the “hats” she wears, her husband unreasonably feels entitled to choosing how her money must be spent. Arguments including the phrase; “What’s yours is mine” are overstated with the psychological intent to make her feel guilty. Instead she remains persistent with controlling the money, aware that if she were to be careless, her husband would spend selfishly and unwisely. Also, anyone feeling entitled to money they haven’t earned makes it sensible for the other person to keep their money to their self.

This situation is very common in households where the woman has a professional degree with a career in medicine, legal work, media, etc. The men usually run the gamut of excuses like they could not find work and that the wife’s’ money is enough for them.

Take for example one instance, the wife buys her own Mercedes Benz but her husband is the one dropping her off to work. Not only doesn’t it affect him that he is driving a car that isn’t his own but he is faced with the daily reality that she has a job and he doesn’t.

Such men have taken the backseat in terms of earning power, happily giving up their roles as bread winner but when it comes to how to spend the money, he is hands-on. They reason that as “head” of the household, it is their right to lead in the decision making, especially with finances. Mind you, this is usually not the norm in their home land. This type of role reversal usually leads to domestic violence and divorce. I believe that it is not how much a man brings home but the role he plays as head of the household. If he puts his best foot forward as a caretaker, his significant other would be easy to please.

~Ashley Okonkwo
Photo Credit: Vincent Mo/zefa/Corbis via Blacksnob.com

Leaving Africa perhaps as a teenager to America is clearly not in vain. The motive is clear. Get an education, start a career and as expected, a family. After all, settling in America is where they envision being long-term; becoming citizens and creating new lives. Eventually, meeting a significant other, and having children become a part of the fulfillment that most men dream to obtain. While it may still be the honeymoon, five, ten years or more, as father, husband, and career man nothing has separated him from his family. However, faced with unexpected circumstances such as loosing their jobs or the sudden need for extra money, it opens the opportunity to do things differently. Rather than reporting to a cubicle or office, their workplace changes. For some, they chose to live their dream as “hustlers”, or business men starting up a buyer/seller business with various things like car parts, fabrics, or anything in high demand.

Leaving his family for the first time, there’s usually a great anticipation of better things to come in the family. The wife is hopeful things go well and anticipate his arrival within one month’s time or less. Unfortunately for her, that doesn’t happen. It turns out to be an additional two weeks because shipments were delayed, or some other bureaucratic red tapes that needed to be cleared before goods are released and sold.

Not suspicious at first, the wife understands the dilemma, confident that this time when he says he will be back, he will. He returns after the additional two weeks but begins making arrangements to leave again. He uses his time home with his wife and children to set up new shipments in order that his business trip goes well when he arrives again and the cycle begins. Whether or not their dream of bettering their prospects becomes a reality, one thing remains for sure; their business trips has now turned into an excuse to travel back and forth to Africa philandering with women without impunity. They have made going back to their native countries routine, and home- treated as a hotel. They settle- in for a month or two, arrange for business, then leave again.

These trips have gone from one month to months at a time. As expected, his absence ruins his family relationships. The wife is left responsible for most finances; both for the children and the home. She doesn’t see her spouse’s full profit because he may be investing much of his money in his country, buying lands or building houses. While there, they get caught up with several women and as a result sometimes have children. However, their secret lives eventually catch up with them and when suspicions of infidelity are confirmed by the wife or her family back home, she divorces him.

There is a famous cliché, “The chicken comes home to roost.”

In most cases the philandering husband wishes to return home to his wife after lives have been destroyed and he is broke only for the wife to reject him. It is my wish that this article will serve as a warning to those who may be considering leaving their families for prolonged periods in search of better prospects in a foreign land. The outcome is often not what was intended on both sides. The lesson is that nothing can replace a happy family unit, not even money or success.

~Ashley I. Okonkwo
~Photocredit: Radiuschurch.org for 1st Pic, Bossip.com 2nd Pic

Shadeism from Shadeism on Vimeo.

Lola Adesioye is a writer (The Guardian, Huffington Post etc.), speaker (motivational) and self-confessed socio-political provocateur. She provides insightful, challenging, thought-provoking and well informed analysis and thought leadership on social, political and personal topics from a global, Generation Y perspective (including regular appearances on radio, CNN and other TV networks).

She brings a fresh and unique international viewpoint to her work: she was born and raised in London, is of Nigerian heritage, has lived in South Africa, now lives in New York and is an avid traveler.

A Masters degree in Social & Political Science from Cambridge University also informs her work.

Be inspired!

________________________

Standing in vulnerability and authenticity, I share my story!
You may wonder why I am always talking about the mind and positivity and so on. Some may wonder what exactly I know about hardship. At the end of the day, I am a middle class privately educated Cambridge University graduate, aren’t I?. No doubt it looks like I was born with a silver spoon stuck up my backside.

Well, never judge a book by its cover. I know about hardship and struggle because I have experienced it. I have been through it and lived to tell the tale.

What outward appearances don’t tell you is that I grew up in a chaotic household where I regularly witnessed my mother being attacked by my father, went (through) violent beatings (ending up once in a visit to the hospital) and emotional abuse myself where belittling, denigration and constant criticism were the order of the day.

It doesn’t tell you what it was like to wake up on Xmas Day at the age of 10 to find that my mother had been taken to hospital after my dad had drunk too much and gone into a violent rage.

This all came to a head at the age of 21 when myself, my mum and my sister packed our bags in secret and fled from the family home, moving out and not telling my dad where we’d gone. There are people who I’ve known since I was a child who probably don’t know that.

Yes I went to private school. . .What you don’t know is the struggle we went through for that to happen. I remember the recession of the early 90s very vividly. My mum lost her job in the City of London where she was a banker and took up a number of jobs that were way beneath her skills in order to pay our way through school. She was determined that, despite the baliffs who would come to our house because of payments that weren’t being met on other things and the incredibly miserable relationship she had with my dad, that we would get the best education possible.

Very few people know that for the first 10 years of my life I lived on a council estate in a not so nice part of London (Peckham to be precise) next door to a crack head who I have fond memories of. He would often break into our home, destroy our car (particularly after his friends would come over in the middle of the night asking for money for drugs and my mum would tell them to go away) or just climb from his balcony to ours when he was high and walk through our apartment. He was a trip! It may have been because of him that I developed an unslightly nervous twitch in one eye which thankfully I trained myself out of, thank goodness. That would not have looked so good on TV.

Oh, and I may have told you about the woman who tried to kill my mother in front of me and my sister one day on the way to school. She thought – being that we lived on a council estate and went to private school – that we were uppity and she needed to attempt to murder my mum to prove that point. After the event was stopped by a neighbour, my mum got in the car, told me not to tell anyone at school and off we went to school.

I say all this not to evoke a pity party. There is no need for pity – I now have a very good relationship with my father and I am a very grounded, emotionally balanced person. But I say it to say that I know about low self esteem and not feeling happy in one’s own skin and how to overcome that. I know about putting on a happy face and pretending that everything is okay when inside you feel absolutely terrible and depressed because I did it for a long time. And there are many, many people doing that every day.

I know what it is to think dark, suicidal thoughts (I wanted to end my life when I was about 15) and to have one’s mind run rampant with thoughts that really impact you in a dis-empowering way.

I know what it is to hate one’s body and physical appearance – and I know what it is to overcome that! I had very disordered eating for a long time, trying to control my repressed emotions through food.

I know what it is to feel despondent and despairing and to wonder if anything will ever change and I know what it is to come out on the other side of that.

I know about shame. Ooh, shame is a killer. Really it is. It robs the soul.

I know what it is to go from never having had a positive role model for a man and having unhealthy interactions with men, to having fantastic, positive, healthy relationships with men and not having the past have anything to do with my present experiences.

I developed a fascination with the mind and language a long time ago. I knew from a young age that it was there that power lived. This is partly what enabled me to be a very high achiever throughout my life and excel in everything I did, despite the emotional chaos I went through at home.

I’ve had therapy, done Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, studied NLP, studied Buddhism, have probably read every single personal development book there is out there. You name it, I have looked into it, examined it, studied it and practised it. All for my own healing.And healed I am. Now, I am a follower of Jesus, who preached, lived and taught love and healing for all. It amazes me that a man died so that all of the shame, condemnation and covering up that we humans do can be eradicated and so that we can be restored to wholeness and to walk and operate in love.

I KNOW the power of the mind and the power of words to fundamentally alter one’s experience of life. This is why the Bible is my favorite book. It’s a book of words of possibility and love and miracles And this is why I talk about it. Not only do I know this for myself but I have seen many hundreds of people – some of whom have gone through a great deal more than I have – also have the same experience. And I have a lot to share on this topic.

This world is not one where people tend to share their deepest feelings. Instead we cover up, smile and look good – and that hurts all of us rather than helps us. I am all about bringing things into the open and being of support and empowerment wherever I can.

This is just the tip of the iceberg of my life story and the beauty of it is that I am happy and thankful for all of it.

None of it holds me back because I am complete with my past and I live a life of my own design.

And I have learned, at a profound level, about love, forgiveness, compassion, leadership, and what’s possible when you know that you are not a function of the past, because none of us are. That, and much more.

Add in my experiences of moving to a new country (US), creating a career and a life from scratch and all of that and I have a wonderful bag of experiences to share.

The financial matters that I blogged about some time ago are the remnants of some of the old stuff and past conditioning. I have been delving into my thoughts, feelings, opinions and perceptions about money and life itself and trust me, that situation is turning around big time – because I am working at the root, that is the level of mind and my state of being. Money is a deep topic because it is really an expression of how you feel about yourself.

The spiritual awakening that I have undergone is the last part of the puzzle of my returning to my wholeness. Knowing myself to be a spiritual being who is a child of God has given me a confidence that I have never had.

I am at a place where I can truly say that I absolutely love who I am. I am a wonderful, beautiful, incredible being and I own that!

I just wanted to share all of this because I am no longer afraid to reveal myself and stand naked (so to speak) in front of the world. For a long time I hid these things because I was afraid. I know that others hide themselves because they too are ashamed and afraid.

I know that in telling my story I can provide a space for others to tell theirs too. No matter what kind of family you grew up in, or what your life was like in the past, there is something here for everyone.

Thanks for sharing the journey!!

~by Lola Adesioye

Former journalist Rene Syler, who underwent a preemptive double mastectomy last year because of her high genetic risk of breast cancer, will join Gabrielle and Kelly Price on THE MO’NIQUE SHOW on Friday, October 22 at 11:00 p.m.*

In a half-hour special report, BET News pulls back the curtain on the whole truth about breast cancer and black women – that their deaths are preventable, and that it is social and economic inequity that has betrayed them – not their own bodies. To tell the story, BET takes viewers to the city of Chicago, where the 38% national breast cancer mortality rate for Black women has exploded to an astronomical 116%. HEART OF THE CITY: CHICAGO’S CANCER DIVIDE will air on Sunday, October 24 at 10:00 p.m.*

In addition to the on-air programming, BET Networks launched a micro-site dedicated to breast cancer awareness on bet.com and will run PSAs to raise awareness about the disease. The Network is also collaborating with the American Cancer Society and Like the River Salon to donate a special day of beauty to African American breast cancer survivors on October 24 in Atlanta, GA.

For more information on “BET Goes Pink” and resources on breast cancer, please log onto www.bet.com/news/betgoespink.

*All times EDT

~Getty Images